"That doesn't make sense.""I may just be super paranoid but is it possible your friend made this list to discourage you from dating her family?" someone else asked."I'd say it's more likely your friend wrote it than the brother," another commenter agreed.
This is an extremely vulnerable time for me already as I've just gotten out of something horrible and am new to the post-college dating scene.” (That’s a real kicker, by the way — this guy’s behavior is the kind of thing you’d expect from a 16-year-old, not an adult.) “I just can't believe that anyone would write something so juvenile and cruel,” u/morlabo finished off. But u/morlabo’s question is relevant in the big picture, aswell: What do we do when we’re faced with behavior like this?
Perhaps the most upsetting thing about the whole situation is the fact that this guy is far from the only one out there like this.
He also wrote that I have "no plan whatsoever" (I've just escaped from a long abusive relationship and moved back home and am fighting PTSD).
He also wrote a to-do list, which included "brainstorm ways to get a girlfriend other than [me]". Most commenters on the post advised the woman to ignore the list – and her crush – for good, and not to waste her energy calling him out."He ain't worth the time," wrote one."His list isn't about you," wrote another.
"It's about how idiot[ic] and immature he is."Others argued that it's natural to weigh up positive and negative traits of possible partners; that the man's only mistake was being careless enough to leave his list out and cause offence."You were probably never meant to see this list," one commenter suggested.
"Most people are honest and different when it's just them and their thoughts."But some commenters found the whole scenario hard to believe, and came up with other theories."No one sits around making lists about people they don't want to date," someone said.
But during a hangout session the other night at her friend’s house while the brother was out, they found a “pros and cons” list lying on a table about u/morlabo — and it was brutal. Continued u/morlabo, “The cons list was much longer and hit a bunch of my insecurities.
“The pros list was short — that I’m small and that I’m a ‘human female who might actually want to f*ck’ him (ew),” u/morlab wrote.“Ew” is right. Because that is me right now, with all of my ire directed straight towards the dude who wrote that list. He made fun of my teeth, my voice, called me clingy (I've hung out with the dude ONCE) and girly and annoying, among other things.
We’re barely a few sentences in, and he is already the worst. He also wrote that I have ‘no plan whatsoever’ (I've just escaped from a long abusive relationship and moved back home and am fighting PTSD).
He also wrote a to-do list, which included ‘brainstorm ways to get a girlfriend other than [me].’”And this is me now:“I'm crushed. “My feelings for him are obviously gone, but my feelings for myself have taken a huge hit. ”Many Redditors jumped in to provide support and advice, much of which leaned towards kicking him to the curb, not wasting any more time on him, being kind to herself, and building up a “Team u/morlabo” to help support her: All good advice, I feel.