If you’re experiencing love to be hard, painful and uncertain, and asking, “Am I in love? Lust and infatuation are usually fleeting and short-lived and don’t tend to turn into love.When you are in love, you will have intense feelings for a guy, and be attracted and connected to him on the level of mind, body and soul. 5 Ways to Get Out of Your Dating Rut and Start Having Fun Again Love is a feeling.
It’s not easy to define our feelings for others — especially romantic feelings, which can leave one in a haze!
I really liked this blog from our guest contributor Janet Ong Zimmerman, who discusses the differences between lust and the real thing. In real life, here is the more common scenario: Guy meets girl, guy has fun with girl but wants to date others, girl just wants to date guy and tries to keep his attention, and girl may stay too long with a guy who isn’t right for her.
When the guy you’re lusting after or are infatuated with doesn’t feel the same way, disappointment and heartache ensue.
As a result, these lustful and infatuation experiences that don’t work out, will cause you to believe, “Love is hard, painful and uncertain.” The reality is love isn’t any of these things.
If you’re struggling with this, here’s a short list to help you go from a casual date to a serious mate (so lame, I know).
1) Be Independent Some “experts” say you should act unavailable.It’s being considerate of your partner and making choices for the greater good of your relationship. Building a strong foundation of love happens by being the best version of you, taking the time to learn about each other, appreciating and accepting each other’s qualities, quirks and differences, being there through thick and thin, resolving differences in a respectful manner and letting him be who he is without trying to change him. When difficulties come up for my partner, I’m here to support him.Dating Advice for Men: Ditch Yesterday’s Rules and Find Love 20 Questions to Know if You’re in Love: Your answers to these questions may reveal if you’re in love. I feel good about the way my partner and I interact and resolve issues. Other times you really like someone and it doesn’t work out, and you’ve probably wondered if there was anything you could’ve done differently. Most of us have experienced a serious relationship by accident, usually when we really like the person we’re dating and it just naturally develops into something more.If you believe happily-ever-after means everything always flows wonderfully, and when your own relationship ebbs and flows, you may not realize you are actually in love with a wonderful guy.Additionally, having strong feelings for someone can make you think you’re in love when you’re actually in lust or infatuated.And when insecurities and fears come up, choosing love is where your greatest growth happens.Love is choosing we over me, unless you’re in an abusive relationship. If my partner were to lose his material possessions, I would still love him and be with him. I’m happy for my partner when good things come his way.Or if guy decides that he wants girl, fears and insecurities that surface from both individuals means that things aren’t the happily ever after portrayed in fairytales and movies.Placing unrealistic expectations from fairytales and movies onto your own love life when reality is different makes it hard to know if you’re in love.